One of the popular talk shows on the island of St. Lucia is called ‘Can I help You?’. It’s well-listened-to, but most people who call aren’t looking for help, but more to be heard.
Without pointing figures, I can say that as I grow older and observe trends and listen to different points of view, I have come to the realization that nobody cares about helping you it’s all about helping themselves.
For the last six months, I have hired a variety of tradesmen at my house because I needed to make or have some renovations done because the skill set they have, I do not possess, so I guess I had no choice.
But I noticed a few facts, including that everybody wants to charge you maximum for their labor, but will do as little as they can to get the job done, in other words they stretch the work. Nobody comes to work on time or before time and they leave as soon as their so-called eight hour-day is done. If it rains, it’s a long break, or pause, the workers blaming the slowdown on the weather, lunch times being extended, and now they also take what they call ‘smoke breaks’ and ‘phone-call breaks’.
To get the work done you have to monitor their every move, and frequently you go into cost overrun or delays due to their attitude. So that, the help you thought you got is calculated. In other words, despite the fact that you are paying, the work is done to their routine and their discretion.
Nothing is for free, yet they never work to your expectations or satisfaction. Everybody has become a con-man, everybody assumes that you are stupid and blind, and to their mind it is them doing you a favor and not the other way around. Some complain about not getting work, or not earning enough for their services, but regardless of how much you help or support them they behave like they must dig-out your eyes.
Relationships are no different, every body expects your maximum while their earnings are to satisfy their personal needs. Men or fathers are always accused of not being supportive to the children, but when you do the maths, it just does not add up. For instance, you may suggest that the young ones get involved in extra-curricula activity actually to broden their horizon but it is usually at the fathers expense.
Bills are not divided equally, the bigger ones always fall on the man’s lap, ever though in some cases the woman earns more than the man and also knows how to save more than their men. A man buys four pairs of shoes per year, but his girl wants a new one every time she goes shopping. If you claim to be in love, especially in the beginning, you have to prove your love by showering them with gifts, or paying for all their social activities.
So, in a nutshell, the cost of loving or dating can be a man’s arm and a leg. Even though you may be married, any time that you make a blunder, it is you who has to go, because mistakes are always seen to be done by the man. And the Law ensures that it remains that way.
As a friend says, at Carnival, eighty percent of the jumpers are women, but it is the men buying the costume, so they can show-off and have a good time.
Now mind you, I will not say that some women don’t get hurt sometimes, or even get fooled, or misled, but in today’s world the women have become smarter than their men. While a man may choose one job, some women choose many jobs, not to feed the family but for self satisfaction and improvement for themselves… Just watch their lifestyles.
A lot of men are bailing off because they are being outsmarted, not because they don’t play fair but it seems that women have more needs than men.
They get educated, get top jobs because they are more employable for several reasons, but men take a lifetime to learn and some never learn at all.
Relationships of the future are on shaky grounds, because of dishonesty and trickery. But I suppose that is life and will go on regardless of the circumstances , in the past most men worked to take care of their love ones and their family, even though they may have met a woman that has children that may not be theirs.
As the saying goes: if you love the woman you are supposed to care for her children, but for most females the motto is ‘take care of me’ at all times.
These are just observations from a man’s point of view, but as the old saying goes: Big Boys Don’t Cry, and nor are they expected to express their feelings, because the big question in the end always is: Who will believe us when we say why we cry?