Let’s be honest — for some people, getting Dad to the doctor can feel like an uphill battle. Many dads would rather push through pain, “wait and see,” or just change the subject whenever “doctor’s appointment” is mentioned. Our concern for the health of the father figures in our lives comes from a place of love, but sometimes our approach has the opposite effect of what we intend.
In honour of Father’s Day weekend, I have outlined a few tips for booking that elusive appointment without a single argument.
1. Frame It Around What He Loves
Appeal to what you know he likes. If Dad loves to play football, cricket, or to go on regular walks or runs, you can say:
“Dad, I just want to make sure you stay in shape to continue playing football with your friends. Have you had your physical yet?”
If a doctor’s visit is connected to something he values, it stops feeling like a chore and starts feeling like a smart move.
2. Share the Load
One reason dads put off the doctor? It feels like too much of a hassle to organize. If, in the end, you just want him to get his physical done, you can take on this administrative task yourself.
• Book the appointment yourself so he doesn’t have to make a single call
• Offer to go with him if he wants the company. You can even make plans to get something to eat afterwards, if you have time.
Making it easy makes it happen.
3. Focus on Staying Strong and Independent
Many people in general avoid doctors because they fear bad news. You can remind him that:
“An annual physical is not about finding problems. It is about staying ahead of them.”
AND
“The goal is to keep you active and strong for as long as possible.”
A quick check-up can catch small things before they become big ones.
4. Use a Teachable Moment
If Dad mentions an issue such as a sore shoulder or trouble sleeping, you can use this as an opportunity by saying:
“You know, the doctor could probably sort that out quickly or at least give you some advice.”
Remember, don’t push or nag — just want to plant the seed. Adults don’t like being scolded or being made to feel small. They may reject what you have to say if they pick up that you are nagging or arguing, even if you mean well.
5. Get an Ally
Sometimes, Dad listens to certain people more than others. That’s okay. Ask yourself:
“Who would Dad listen to?”
Then get that person on board to help you convince Dad to see the doctor. This person could be a close family member or Dad’s good friend. A trusted voice can go a long way.
What to Expect at Different Ages
When Dad Turns 40
At 40, it is time to be more proactive. Important screenings he should discuss with his doctor include:
• Blood pressure, cholesterol, and blood sugar checks
• PSA test — a simple blood test to check the prostate
• Eye and dental checks
• Mental health check-in — stress is an important risk to health that should be checked for and managed
• Heart health screening — especially if there is a family history of heart disease
When Dad Turns 45
By 45, a few tests are added:
• Colonoscopy — to screen for colorectal cancer
• Continued PSA monitoring
• Heart health screening — especially if there is a family history of heart disease
Tests can sound scary, but catching issues early means more options and better outcomes. You just need to be there to give Dad the support he needs. Early detection saves lives.
A Final Word
I hope this helps you have that conversation with your father figure(s) — or whoever the special man in your life may be. Remember, fear of the doctor is real, and it is okay to acknowledge that. Let Dad know you are not trying to pressure him; you just want what’s best for him. He may not come around right away; it may take a long time. In some cases, a very, very long time. But it’s important for him to know that when he is ready, he can come to you for help and support.
Patience and support go further than any argument ever could.
I wish you a safe and healthy Father’s Day weekend.
Dr Rachel Thwaites-Williams,
Family Physician and Public Health Specialist
